5 things 25 years of grief taught me

I was 12 when my dad died on 9/11. For years, I thought grief was something I'd eventually get over. It never shrank. I grew around it.

A few weeks ago my first book, You're Not Dead Yet, came out. Since then, these five reminders have come up again and again in your messages and comments. I keep them close on the good days and the hard ones. Maybe one of them is for you today.

1. You're still here. Don't waste it. The uncertainty of life is part of what makes it sacred.

2. You can't control what happens. You can choose what happens next. We don't always choose the pain. We do have a say in what we do with it.

3. Pain and joy can exist in the same life. You can be hurting and still be living.

4. You don't need permission to feel good again. Joy doesn't erase what hurt you. You're allowed to hold both.

5. Don't wait to appreciate what you have.

We're often better at missing things than noticing them while they're still here.

Save this. Screenshot it. Send it to someone who needs it right now.

These reminders come straight from You're Not Dead Yet: How Grief and Loss Can Teach You to Live. It's a book about life, written through 25 years of grief and hundreds of conversations on DEAD Talks.

[Get the book] → deadtalks.net/book

If you've already read it, thank you. It means more than you know. One small favor: leaving a quick review on Amazon helps the book reach the next person who needs it.

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With love, David

P.S. Which reminder hit closest for you?